Posts: 2
Threads: 1
Joined: Apr 2020
All My Fears About Us
Is it too early?
Or is it too late?
Is there even a chance?
Or did I already miss the date?
Do you deserve to know?
Or do you just need your space?
Do I owe it to myself?
Or is what we have enough?
Does this damage what we have?
Or do I owe you more trust?
Do I even know the feeling?
Or is this just lust?
My gut is telling me this is too short, but I don't really know.
Posts: 7
Threads: 2
Joined: Feb 2020
Hello,
I enjoyed the structure and style of this poem, it seems to capture racing, doubtful thoughts. I also liked the rhyming, I'm partial to rhyming haha.
If you want to follow the gut feeling that it's too short, I do think some of the lines could be developed a little more so that they are less vague. Instead of saying "Does this..." you could say "Does ____ " with more description. Also, you could add one non-question line after each stanza of questions. Just some suggestions! Thanks for sharing your writing.