Ilizarov technique

[Keith]

I wished to improve the length of my legs
as often as not I couldn't reach that ledge.
See my peddles had blocks of wood bolted on
such that I could reach them like every young son.
My trousers were turned up three or four times
and I found it hard to walk in straight lines.

I asked in the shop for some magic cream
but the pharmacist said he only had beans.
So the doctor broke every bone that I had
and screwed and stretched the legs on this lad.
Each day the holes bled as the tension increased
until it was time for my final release.

The bolts were undone, the pins were extracted
and four inches taller, this kid is protracted.

[Leanne]

Holy effin' ouch, that doesn't sound like fun at all!

This reminds me a little of Ronnie Corbett talking about his "positive thinking therapy with stretching exercises". One must assume that the Ilizarov technique is a bit more effective, considering Ronnie's ultimate height -- though I never saw him riding a bike so I can't be sure.

I really can imagine the little fellow at the pharmacist's counter begging for a cure -- and the allusion to magic beans nicely sums up what sorts of tragic stupidity people will put themselves (or their children) through to achieve results that really aren't worth enduring the treatment for. This is a light examination of an absurd situation, nicely highlighting the ridiculousness of society's standards and the lengths people go to for conformity.

[vagabond]

I especially like the sarcastic use of “improve” for an objective noun like length in the first line.
the beans are my second favourite, almost see some revolutionary cure that would help vanquish the obstacles for laddy, but was not recognized as such.

[Achebe]

Sounds like fun...not
Thanks for the education!

[just mercedes]

For some reason this reminded me of the boy with a club foot, in Madame Bovary, who was being treated by her husband. Ouch.

[rayheinrich]

The simpler solution would have been to bolt the blocks of wood to the shoes, not the peddles.
But society seems to prefer expensive suffering. I can't help thinking how much trouble --
time-consuming construction of crosses and whatnot -- the Romans went to just to cause
a bit of suffering.  And how much so many people are willing to worship it.

All these thoughts brought up by your poem. Good writing.
Ray

P.S. And posting it in "Poetry For Fun"... you have a flare for dark irony as well.

[Keith]

Holy effin' ouch, that doesn't sound like fun at all!

This reminds me a little of Ronnie Corbett talking about his "positive thinking therapy with stretching exercises".  One must assume that the Ilizarov technique is a bit more effective, considering Ronnie's ultimate height -- though I never saw him riding a bike so I can't be sure.

I really can imagine the little fellow at the pharmacist's counter begging for a cure -- and the allusion to magic beans nicely sums up what sorts of tragic stupidity people will put themselves (or their children) through to achieve results that really aren't worth enduring the treatment for.  This is a light examination of an absurd situation, nicely highlighting the ridiculousness of society's standards and the lengths people go to for conformity.

I missed these replies Leanne, sorry I'm late getting back, yes not sure this should be in fun but you are right it was supposed to be light hearted, I think you have my intentions pegged. Thanks Keith

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I especially like the sarcastic use of “improve” for an objective noun like length in the first line.
the beans are my second favourite, almost see some revolutionary cure that would help vanquish the obstacles for laddy, but was not recognized as such.

Thank you for commenting Vagabond glad you caught the sacastic tone

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Sounds like fun...not
Thanks for the education!

Thanks Achebe I've seen this at close quarters, not much fun as you say.

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For some reason this reminded me of the boy with a club foot, in Madame Bovary, who was being treated by her husband. Ouch.

I can see that link Mercedes, similar levels of distress. Thanks Keith

---

The simpler solution would have been to bolt the blocks of wood to the shoes, not the peddles.
But society seems to prefer expensive suffering. I can't help thinking how much trouble --
time-consuming construction of crosses and whatnot -- the Romans went to just to cause
a bit of suffering.  And how much so many people are willing to worship it.

All these thoughts brought up by your poem. Good writing.
Ray

P.S. And posting it in "Poetry For Fun"... you have a flare for dark irony as well.

Thanks Ray, yes he had one of those shoes aswell but the opp sorted him out and yes again society can be cruel. Yes Dark ironing I'll go with that.