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beach boy

beach boy
ellajam Offline
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#1
09-03-2014, 01:58 AM
(09-03-2014, 01:56 AM)entwife Wrote:  he orbits the women
held by salivational force

Big Grin
Well done.
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alatos Offline
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#2
09-12-2014, 10:32 PM
I think that's good. The imagery of women holding him like a planet in orbit - predictable, nearby, but probably never progressing any closer - paints a nice picture. He is like a satellite or a moon... a "second rate citizen."
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Erthona Offline
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#3
09-13-2014, 05:41 AM
mercurial poisoning will do that, and there is nothing more mercurial than a woman Smile


dale
How long after picking up the brush, the first masterpiece?

The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.
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rowens
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#4
09-13-2014, 05:51 AM
I thought the member named denniswilson was the one that started this post. I don't know why.
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Mwaba don Offline
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#5
09-23-2014, 03:13 AM
(09-03-2014, 01:56 AM)entwife Wrote:  he orbits the women
held by salivational force

I know I am a leaner but i thought haiku's have three lines. Nice imagination to mention salivational force but i thought it may be too general. that is food, sex or drinks, or some  other kind of desires?
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