untitled

[rowens]

When you're working on art. Though sometimes not even then.

Comments are comments. They're just material. And not even that.

[untitled]

So it is what it is except when it isn't

[rowens]

I'm not working today. Today is my day of rest. The seventh day and the first day. Sunday is first and last, Alpha and Omega. So I just live in decadence. Tomorrow, I'll work with it again. Yesterday I was Jewish. I rested then too; and I also did some work.

[untitled]

Very nice.

Though one can argue that decadence requires effort.

Gratification, on the other hand, is much easier.

[rowens]

Tomorrow, I'll have served in the United States Army. And Sarah that works at the bank on Main Street, since the banks won't be open, she won't have that excuse anymore. So while I'm remembering and resting in front of my grill, I can work hard on undermining her new excuses.

This is your poem. My tribble comment isn't a poem. It doesn't require artistic merit.

[untitled]

This is "your" poem or this is "my" poem or is it "a" poem. Is it my poem now? Have you given it to me?

Of course not, hence the intended humor.

[Leanne]

These threads have been merged to preserve comments/ admin

[rowens]

There were so many variations of the exact same poem. All saying the same thing. I thought each one was supposed to be seen differently. This was the Fun version. It requires nothing specifically, not even Fun.

My Apollonian linear method of pacing the Mild version after my layered version, now this one.

Now this one too.

This is what you get when everything's untitled.

[untitled]

There were so many variations of the exact same poem. All saying the same thing. I thought each one was supposed to be seen differently. This was the Fun version. It requires nothing specifically, not even Fun.

My Apollonian linear method of pacing the Mild version after my layered version, now this one.

Now this one too.

This is what you get when everything's untitled.

This I like. Very much.

---

This I will
Will it break
Will it shape
Will it mold

This I won't
Not because I can't
But because I don't

[rowens]

Your Socratic method is fine for now. Sunday Zagreus is lazy today.

[untitled]

Your Socratic method is fine for now. Sunday Zagreus is lazy today.

You enjoy allegory
Do you bore of your own story
Or prefer the fiction of others

[rowens]

I mean everything I say literally.

You should write another poem. So I can read it when I get back to work. Instead of asking so many questions.

[cidermaid]

You seem to be full of questions your own confidence to ably analyse and box up the offered feedback into psychological profiles for each reply. I have a few questions to ask.
What was your intent and objective when you joined the site? (If it was not to write poetry and then endeavour to improve said poetry, (as you suggest in your statment that you would be unlikely to write anything further) Why join a poetry site? Do you actually appreciate poetry or is this only an exercise in testing your psycoanalysis profiling techniques. Because from your comments and conduct thus far, it feels like you are gathering a set of data for modelling into a research paper or some other equally non poetry based objective. Your replies would suggest that you have little interest in the poetry and as rowens mentions above so many questions but little about poetry. I would second his suggestion that you might like to try writing a poem.

Lastly you might like to add the following to your profile data.
I did not find the last lines more "sensible" I was just trying to find something polite and possibly encouraging to say about a poem that was entered into a "for crit" section that, as Milo so ably put it, was just a list of words and that in my opinion had the appearance of trying to be pretentious and clever. My intent was that if the poems was workshoped I could have perhaps then encouraged the writer to think about the aspects of the clichés that littered the last lines (that again Milo brought up) in a future edit, so in short my reply was not in anyway near a reflection of my thoughts. Therefore I would suggest that your sampling option in this case is flawed and you should reformat your techniques.

If I write a list say Fridge, clinic, carpentry am I making some deep and meaningful comment about...well of course the reader will need to work this out, because it's art darling and cannot be confined to just one interpretation. (I might have been thinking about the need to conform to a standard of image that says being overweight is unacceptable and drawing a line from this into mental instability and the extreme aspects of this resulting in high suicide rates. Or perhaps I was just putting a load of Bollacks out there for the hell of it). Perhaps rowens is toying with you to mess with your head, just because he can or perhaps not.

Your humble opinion of me as deduced from your reading of my comments...a reflection of an individual comforted by shared values, strong societal norms and a well-defined worldview.....sadly not even close enough to be classified meaningless.

[untitled]

You seem to be full of questions your own confidence to ably analyse and box up the offered feedback into psychological profiles for each reply. I have a few questions to ask.
What was your intent and objective when you joined the site? (If it was not to write poetry and then endeavour to improve said poetry, (as you suggest in your statment that you would be unlikely to write anything further) Why join a poetry site? Do you actually appreciate poetry or is this only an exercise in testing your psycoanalysis profiling techniques. Because from your comments and conduct thus far, it feels like you are gathering a set of data for modelling into a research paper or some other equally non poetry based objective. Your replies would suggest that you have little interest in the poetry and as rowens mentions above so many questions but little about poetry. I would second his suggestion that you might like to try writing a poem.

Lastly you might like to add the following to your profile data.
I did not find the last lines more "sensible" I was just trying to find something polite and possibly encouraging to say about a poem that was entered into a "for crit" section that, as Milo so ably put it, was just a list of words and that in my opinion had the appearance of trying to be pretentious and clever. My intent was that if the poems was workshoped I could have perhaps then encouraged the writer to think about the aspects of the clichés that littered the last lines (that again Milo brought up) in a future edit, so in short my reply was not in anyway near a reflection of my thoughts. Therefore I would suggest that your sampling option in this case is flawed and you should reformat your techniques.

If I write a list say Fridge, clinic, carpentry am I making some deep and meaningful comment about...well of course the reader will need to work this out, because it's art darling and cannot be confined to just one interpretation. (I might have been thinking about the need to conform to a standard of image that says being overweight is unacceptable and drawing a line from this into mental instability and the extreme aspects of this resulting in high suicide rates. Or perhaps I was just putting a load of Bollacks out there for the hell of it). Perhaps rowens is toying with you to mess with your head, just because he can or perhaps not.

Your humble opinion of me as deduced from your reading of my comments...a reflection of an individual comforted by shared values, strong societal norms and a well-defined worldview.....sadly not even close enough to be classified meaningless.

I am very interested in poetry. I only ask questions to gain a better understand of a person's perspective. I assure you, this is not a ruse to collect data for a master's thesis on psychoanalysis.

I've enjoyed a lot of the content on this site and learnt a lot from the questions I've asked.

As for the cliched last lines which Milo touched on as well. I appreciate the feedback but we must agree to disagree on what substitutes cliche. The last lines are idioms but used for the purpose of invoking societal norms and pressures to conform. Is a cliche a cliche when used for the purpose of being a cliche? (again, I think the inclusion of idioms as cliches may be a bit too broad)

You are right. My opinion is beyond meaningless. It is nothing. You can accept it, discard it, distort it or forget it. It's nothing more than an interpretation of your analysis. But each individual's analysis is unique and framed by their own worldview or perception. I'm just trying to understand yours. I do find it interesting that your analysis is the polar opposite of wildcard's. You think the last lines should be expanded upon and developed. Wildcard believes the last lines do not fit and should be discarded.

I would like to continue writing poetry. I just don't know what to write about.

[untitled]

Interesting. Maybe use it as symbol of integrative relationships within society.

I am a beginner. I wrote one poem in a moment of expression. It would take a lot of work to be half as creative or half as good as other poems on the site.

[Leendzorro]

Whisper
Hush thoughts
Woolen Eyes
Think not, young mind

Dissonance
Sparks synapse
Iron lungs
Fear not, brave heart

Sweat
Wooden hands
Weakened earth
Rest not, cold touch

Whimper
Curved paths
Chalked form
Sleep now, old bones

I really like this.

[Ryan_w_r]

I don't get it...... But it sounds good! Kinda like French, I don't understand it but it sounds pretty.

[rayheinrich]

...
I would like to continue writing poetry. I just don't know what to write about.
...

Here's something you could write about: