I like the lovely, ethereal quality in this... I just want to wallow in it 
Hope my comments are useful
Hope my comments are useful
(06-08-2011, 06:46 AM)violet Wrote: Lost
held by you
wrapped in grace
inhaling dew from perfumed exchange
exquisite aromas rising from between two
supple waves of spell binding titillation
given by your lips
only consummates not sure consummates is the word? my adoration
blossoming beneath untamed energy it's the descriptions of "titillation" and "energy" that confuses me a little... I know this is supposed to be a love scene, but skipping between excited and then immediately calm imagery creates a disjoint (for me anyway, just imo)
i become a glittering ocean
slowly you drift
into me
Bliss nice arc to the end
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?