11-28-2010, 11:40 AM
I don't know who Jimmy Hoffa is, though I've heard the name somewhere, but the mark of a good poem, I think, is that it can be enjoyed on some level even if the topic isn't familiar to all. This is one such poem. The images were great, the first line was a gem, and the penultimate stanza contained that nice brooding horror which appears in a lot of your verse.
I have just one small nit: the last stanza, as Billy said, seems a tad cliche, and overly dramatic when you consider the tough, streamlined, down-to-earth diction of the previous lines.
Other than that though, great work.
I have just one small nit: the last stanza, as Billy said, seems a tad cliche, and overly dramatic when you consider the tough, streamlined, down-to-earth diction of the previous lines.
Other than that though, great work.
"We believe that we invent symbols. The truth is that they invent us; we are their creatures, shaped by their hard, defining edges." - Gene Wolfe