Daisies on a Hill

[addy]

I do admit that I felt a little jarred by the change in direction of the poem, but I could see how it was intentional... its exactly the feeling when tragedy hits your life. Maybe there's a way you can keep the emotional whiplash while still tying together the image more tightly.

That said, I agree with the others. We're here to offer opinions, but you have full autonomy over your work