The Cold of Cailleach

[Richard]

Hey Leanne,
I'm afraid I'm not as familiar with mythology as I used to be, but I'll try to give some helpful suggestions:

The cloud-crowned thunderer -I'm assuming this is Zeus or Thor. I quite like the wording here. When I read this out loud, it just sounded wonderful.
speaks to his people
with the falling rain -I like the idea of the god here speaking to his followers with the weather. However, I would suggest using a different word than "falling" because it seems a bit redundant to me. All rain falls, doesn't it?
 
He speaks often -Is the word "speaks" repeated intentionally?
and is not always polite -I like this detail because it's true from what I know of the ancient gods, and also true of the rain.
 
Turning her smooth face skyward -Even after reading this poem multiple times, I have no idea who the "her" is here. My lack of knowledge about mythology is probably the cause though.
the loch lady drinks
at one with the salmon til season’s end -I find this a quirky image, but I like it. Is this a hint at who the goddess may be?
 
She blesses her followers
with gifts of ale and mead -It was thinking about this stanza that made me realize how the two line stanzas are outlining how the gods treat the mortals. I quite like your use of structure in this way.
 
The threefold goddess
blue-faced now and one-eyed
breathes ice into open-mouthed crags -I think this stanza might be the strongest in the poem. Its imagery is just wonderful, and I can see and feel it as I read it.
 
Her love for her people
has no room for weakness -I found this stanza interesting because it makes this goddess' love sound somewhat cold, which is appropriate considering the previous stanza.
 
Foreign stones do not crush -I might be missing something, but I feel like "Foreign stones" is an image that could be expanded upon.
a breast that has risen and fallen -Whose breast is this? Which god's, or all of them?
since suns were ice -I like this line. I'm a sucker for paradoxical description. Plus, it emphasizes how old the gods are.
 
To be reborn each year
until the years are no more -This stanza accurately describes the curse of immortality. 
 
In the shadow of the storm -I wonder if you could describe the storm so it connects back to the idea of the rain being some form of communication? Just a thought.
the great stag watches -I feel like the great stag is another god, but I could be wrong.
and dreams of spring -The image of spring ties back to the the idea of rebirth nicely.
 
When he and his newly-young goddess
will bring the land to life -Wouldn't the rain do that as well? I wonder is there a way to make that connection? Just a thought. 

I almost didn't post this critique because as I worked on it, I realized I was probably missing some important background knowledge to fully appreciate this poem. I just hope some of what I said was helpful. I also didn't read the other critiques, so forgive me if I repeated anything someone else said.

Cheers.
Richard