When a song must be sung: short poem
#2
(02-17-2016, 03:04 PM)Achebe Wrote:  When a song must be sung
it shall ring from the rooftops -- cliche?
drummed by the hoof drops
of rising rain.

Though money's for the taking
on deals in the making
your lips will be quaking
from words unsaid.
Confused by the rhyme scheme. Sung doesn't have a pair unless it's ring or drummed, then rooftops and drops pair....does rain pair with unsaid? It doesn't, the way I would say them. But, taking, making, quaking are so straightforward in their rhyme, it makes the ones that don't have a clear match really stand out.
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When a song must be sung: short poem - by Achebe - 02-17-2016, 03:04 PM
RE: When a song must be sung: short poem - by Lizzie - 02-11-2017, 02:17 PM



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