Hues

[mlund]

[Image: http://40.media.tumblr.com/ef0f97a38c2a5...o1_500.jpg]

''Hues''

She was red. I was blue.
We were different hues.
Different views.
The friction grew,
The addiction too,
Which we didn't know our limits too.Im not sure if your meant to use"too" but I think "to" would work better conceptually

She was a Dark Red, afraid of her surroundings.
I was a Carolina Blue.
Full energy and always kept pounding.
The fiery latina attitude matched her shade of Flame.It does not make sense to me how she can be timid and fiery at the same time
While I was true blue - Honesty and Loyalty was my main game.If you are going to capitalize the colors in order to draw attention to their meaning, stay consistent with it throughout the whole poem

Sometimes she was a  Lust red, and we felt the passion together
Especially when I showed her steel blue.
I felt stronger than ever.
I wanted to reveal my Royal Blue. Show her my definition of love.
Embracing her Maroon while reminding her she will be loved.This line is a very good play on ideas/words

I always made sure to communicate, even when I was teal.
But she remained oxblood, her pride kept her from keeping it real.
A dark cloud in my sky blue front.
Her feelings were Crimson - all tide up.The tempo and rhythm changes drastically throughout-it goes from fast and staccato to slower with longer lines. Maybe try to keep it more consistent to make it easier to read.

I was very excited when I starred reading this poem-the first stanza was great. But after that it became awkward, and forced. Your metaphors did not flow as easily and many did not even make sense. It was a great idea that could be reconciled with a little more thought and attention.