***/To My Children/

[ellajam]

Hi, bog, this is a lovely read, some notes are below.

At some unnamed night, Possibly On instead of At. Possibly condense into "On some bright night" with a more interesting word than bright.
and it will be bright,
I'll go away.
The door I will never I don't think you need "I".
close
the flowers will keep
fragrance.
My children will have fallen asleep
the most deeply Possibly lose "the".
covered and caressed
and somebody will cant to them again
a cradle song.
It will be light like in a temple Consider a comma or break after "light".
and clear like a voice
in mountains.
Then I'll leave
forgotten all the words…

A branch in the white snow.




translation from Bulgarian

Thanks for posting this, a pleasure to read.