05-22-2014, 06:53 AM
I concede, I have paid no attention to punctuation. Nor is it a poem intended to impress anyone with clever use of written language. It's a story, thoughts condensed and molded into a format that emerged in the time spent on it. It's a vision, not a literary masterpiece and I do not expect to ever write one.
It reads better to me centered, easier to consume. I'm not that concerned with style, to be honest. I am interested in critique of the content: did I succeed in communicating my thoughts.
Not to say established techniques (of which I know precisely nothing) are irrelevant, but they are secondary to me. I only want to be understood or even better, be clearly misunderstood.
I find it interesting that you compare it to a computer program. I am a veteran computer programmer, so that's probably a valid observation. I guess I like to structure written language to resemble the orderly nature of well written computer programs. I'm sorry it did not please your synapses.
It reads better to me centered, easier to consume. I'm not that concerned with style, to be honest. I am interested in critique of the content: did I succeed in communicating my thoughts.
Not to say established techniques (of which I know precisely nothing) are irrelevant, but they are secondary to me. I only want to be understood or even better, be clearly misunderstood.
I find it interesting that you compare it to a computer program. I am a veteran computer programmer, so that's probably a valid observation. I guess I like to structure written language to resemble the orderly nature of well written computer programs. I'm sorry it did not please your synapses.