What the Cats Know

[Todd]

Hi Chris, this one was a surprise. There were some elements here that I really enjoyed. Comments below:

In daylight,
I am perpetually cloaked
in fabric, leather and white lab-coat;--I know you are allowed to do this but maybe comma after leather for clarity.
over-fettered by words and monthly reports.--I think you can cut over

--Okay, now to diverge from what I said earlier. I think this poem needs to get to the good stuff sooner, and build more quickly. I would consider starting the poem with this next line. I realize we're contrasting with the clothing later, but I truthfully think it doesn't matter as much as picking up the pace.
Only the night and occasional cat
see me naked and vulnerable,
while sneaking out to the recycle bin
or standing on my deck
in the purging rain.--From the cat to here, it feels very tight and quick. I like the details that show the hidden person. I like the cat, the recycle bins.

I’m capable of baring all
in the bright sunlight;--This claim feels a little strong. If so, than why hasn't the speaker. I don't mind the phrasing, but it feels like the statement needs to be more: I could bare it all in the bright sunlight
disclosing that one testicle
hangs lower than the other
or let it be known that an alien worm--This is very cool after the testical lines.
clings to my skin and taunts
of where my appendix used to be.
I could divulge that blue veins
fishnet my loins and thighs
after making love
or vigorous exercise.--All of this is excellent, and a fun example of what the cat knows. There's a perverse part of me that might title this: What the Cat Already Knows

Beneath clothing hides
those furtive moles,
the splattered ink of secrets;--Love that phrasing
my journey and unspoken history.--And how you build on it
Deeper still, where axons amass --And shift from body to mind
and synapses lie bare,
dwell murmurs of how
I feel for you.--Nice change up from the physical to the emotional. No nits from me in this strophe. Smooth.

My layers are transparent
at night
as I become a glass artichoke.--I might move from simile to metaphor and kill the as. Such a strange yet appropriate image. It is one of my favorite in the poem for its oddness. It feels like the right choice though.
Before the moon,
I lose all mystery.--I think the ending was strong.

After going through these comments again, I'm more than convinced that you can cut the opening. That is your choice and call of course. Great poem Chris!

Best,

Todd