08-13-2012, 12:36 PM
So, he'd still have sailed there
Why does it need to be Africa?
Why does it need to be Africa?
It could be worse
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A Spenserian Master's Tale:
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08-13-2012, 12:38 PM
because you bloody well said you missed africa
08-13-2012, 12:41 PM
so any other place will do then
damn, that's a shame
finally i decided what to put.
08-13-2012, 04:38 PM
Oh, I like that -- the sense of distance is much greater now (and it's one blowy piece of freezing cold water to another on the other side of the world
 )Plus, the meter's spot on.
It could be worse
08-13-2012, 05:00 PM
thanks leanne, it was worth the trouble and what's better i enjoyed doing it immensely.
08-13-2012, 05:27 PM
Ha! I knew I'd corrupt you eventually!
It's a lovely piece, billy, you should be very proud.
It could be worse
08-13-2012, 06:31 PM
It is good, Billy. The only other thing I'd suggest is to continue the sentence at the end of 2nd verse
so I could leave the harbour with my ship to navigate the Firth of Forth, or skip
Before criticising a person, try walking a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticise them, you're a mile away.....and you have their shoes.
08-13-2012, 07:30 PM
thanks ray
it's a doable but i hate not starting the stanza without a cap  i'll think on it |
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