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12-22-2011, 01:22 PM
(This post was last modified: 12-22-2011, 02:08 PM by Leanne.)
mas Carol (>  < Aish)
Every year my kids help me ruin -- I mean rewrite -- a few Christmas Carols, like this one:
I saw Molly Kitten’s sandy claws
Underneath the fish and chip shop light --
She didn’t hear me come
Up behind, she was too dumb,
She didn’t even notice me until I kicked her bum.
Then I saw Molly Kitten’s sandy claws
Flying through the air, oh what a sight!
Don’t know what I’m gonna say
To the RSPCA --
Who’d have thought those lights would make the cat ignite?
and this:
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree,
They made you in a factory
With plastic leaves and plastic trunk
You're mostly old recycled junk
You'll never die, you're evergreen
And made of polyethylene
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree
Requires some assembly
Keeping it reasonably family-friendly, maybe we could all have a go?
It could be worse
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I have always got words to songs wrong- sometimes when corrected I would not believe that I was wrong until I read the words for myself from a reputable source. For years I thought the old church hymn was 'Andy walks with me, Andy talks with me . . .' 
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I'm still giggling over the recent posts sidebar, where this is listed as "Destruction of the Christ"
Pretty much sums up my humbuggery.
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?
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I'm not sure I don't like that better, Aish...
It could be worse
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I didn't even notice
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We can 'moderate' the thread title 
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?
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(12-22-2011, 01:50 PM)Aish Wrote: We can 'moderate' the thread title
Knock yourselves out
It could be worse
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I can't. It won't let me edit the title.
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?
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Haha... what do you want to edit it to and I'll change it... anything for you.
It could be worse
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Aw, shucks. "Destruction of the Christ" please. > <
You ROCK Mamacita <3
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?
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This is not my 'official' contribution, it is merely my 'stalling tactic' contribution:
Jingle Bells
Batman smells
Robin laid an egg -
the batmobile lost a wheel
and the Joker got away
Hey!
PS. If you can, try your hand at giving some of the others a bit of feedback. If you already have, thanks, can you do some more?
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I loved the tale of the child that named its old battered teddy bear 'Gladly' from the hymn.
- Gladly, my cross-eyed bear - but, that's another story.
I shall go away and have a think about a Christmas carol that I can mutilate.
(In the Bleak Mid-Winter)
By the sweet shop window
Snotty kids made moan
Mum stood hard as iron
Father like a stone
No ! he’s yelling No-No-No!
No! No! No! No!No!
By the sweet shop window
Just an hour ago.
feek and weeble, but it's been a tiring day.
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It might help if I'd heard of the original song before
It's better than what I came up with . . . big fat nothing(Aish stole my Jingle Bells  ) We used to sing that as kinds (Wasn't that on The Simpsons?)
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(12-24-2011, 02:27 AM)Mark Wrote: It might help if I'd heard of the original song before
It's better than what I came up with . . . big fat nothing(Aish stole my Jingle Bells ) We used to sing that as kinds (Wasn't that on The Simpsons?)
For you my dearest,
In the Bleak Mid Winter
Frosty winds made moan
Earth stood hard as iron
Water like a stone
Snow had fallen, snow on snow
sno'o'w on snow
In the Bleak Mid Winter
Lo'o'o'ng ago
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Sergeant Claude is taking you down town
(sung to the tune of ‘Santa Claus is Coming to Town’)
Oh! You better watch out,
it ain’t no lie
Sergeant Claude’s a voyeur,
he likes to spy.
Now Sergeant Claude is taking you down town.
------------------------------------------------------------
He works for the PO-lice,
Undercover working vice,
if he catches you having fun,
you know it won’t be nice.
Chorus:
--------------------------------------------------------
He knows that you’ve been drinking,
and driving in your car,
and if he sees you doing that,
you know you want get far.
Chorus:
-----------------------------------------------------
That girl that you’ve been seeing,
did you know she’s underage,
and if you're caught in bed with her,
he’ll lock you in a cage.
Chorus:
How long after picking up the brush, the first masterpiece?
The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.
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I lost the tune somewhere in the middle, but that was because I began to concentrate on your words....so that's no bad thing. I returned and sang the whole thing successfully (with vigour) to the bemusement of my dear one.
-----> want ------> won't, a simple typo I know...but thought you might want to change it.
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(12-24-2011, 04:58 AM)Erthona Wrote: Sergeant Claude is taking you down town
(sung to the tune of ‘Santa Claus is Coming to Town’)
Oh! You better watch out,
it ain’t no lie
Sergeant Claude’s a voyeur,
he likes to spy.
Now Sergeant Claude is taking you down town.
------------------------------------------------------------
He works for the PO-lice,
Undercover working vice,
if he catches you having fun,
you know it won’t be nice.
Chorus:
--------------------------------------------------------
He knows that you’ve been drinking,
and driving in your car,
and if he sees you doing that,
you know you want get far.
Chorus:
-----------------------------------------------------
That girl that you’ve been seeing,
did you know she’s underage,
and if you're caught in bed with her,
he’ll lock you in a cage.
Chorus:
There aren't enough smilies to show how freaking great this is!
Btw I was glad to see POlice as that how it's pronounced in these here hills :d
(12-24-2011, 02:58 AM)grannyjill Wrote: (12-24-2011, 02:27 AM)Mark Wrote: It might help if I'd heard of the original song before
It's better than what I came up with . . . big fat nothing(Aish stole my Jingle Bells ) We used to sing that as kinds (Wasn't that on The Simpsons?)
For you my dearest,
In the Bleak Mid Winter
Frosty winds made moan
Earth stood hard as iron
Water like a stone
Snow had fallen, snow on snow
sno'o'w on snow
In the Bleak Mid Winter
Lo'o'o'ng ago
Thanks Jill! Now I can see what's going on. Nice job.
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GJ, Mark,
Thanks, it was a quicky. Yeah I like the PO-lice thing myself. I grew up in north central Texas. Where asphalt has a liquid state, and Fall is the day the temperature drops from 98 to 36 while you are inside eating lunch.
Dale
How long after picking up the brush, the first masterpiece?
The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.
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