Pretty Little Things

[DJesters]

She said she’s higher than she’s ever been;
I put her in the clouds. 
Was it love or all the drugs?
Still trying to figure it all out. 
I used to think she was an angel,
but looking at it now
even the devil got his start
as a helper to the crown. 
There might’ve been some signs 
that she wasn’t who she seemed
but I think we’ve all been blinded 
by pretty little things.

[dukealien]

She said she’s higher than she’s ever been; might consider colon instead of semi- here if the next line is consequence of this one.
I put her in the clouds. 
Was it love or all the drugs?
Still trying to figure it all out. 
I used to think she was an angel,  I'd not use a comma here
but looking at it now
even the devil got his start
as a helper to the crown.  perhaps remove "a."  This is quite subtle; might capitalize "crown."
There might’ve been some signs 
that she wasn’t who she seemed might remove "that"
but I think we’ve all been blinded 
by pretty little things.

A nice little poem with some further-reaching implications.  The speaker, for example, compares him?self to God, and also implies a very interesting story - that God was blinded to Lucifer's impending treachery (or just rebellion) by L's star-of-morning beauty.

That may be over-reading, but the poem's well enough done to support it.

[ISawASpaceship]

She said she’s higher than she’s ever been;
I put her in the clouds. 
Was it love or all the drugs?
Still trying to figure it all out. (This might sound better as "I'm still trying to figure it out." The flow is a little bit off. It's still good, just a smidgen off)
I used to think she was an angel, 
but looking at it now
even the devil got his start
as a helper to the crown. 
There might’ve been some signs 
that she wasn’t who she seemed
but I think we’ve all been blinded 
by pretty little things.

A poem that gives insight into how the writer is feeling but also lacks insight into the other person's feelings. As a reader, I tend to think that the critique of the woman's character might not be fair, as we are all human and we all do both good and bad things and we are human.

[Quixilated]

Just a thought, maybe the girl you speak of is human and humans are not only unpredictable but they have something called feelings and feelings may present themselves as hard to read. It's probably not the drugs. Most women, not all, are more interested in the other drug of choice that is not an actual drug. (She's getting high by being in your presence.) All of that could probably be solved by talking it out and asking her what she's thinking. Communication is key. And when you're thinking about it just realize that humans aren't angels or demons. We aren't all perfect, we aren't all totally and completely evil. We do both good and bad things and even if she has hurt you, it doesn't mean that she intended to. My point is, sometimes humans are complex. You do things that aren't good too. Common, we all have.

Please take a moment to review our site rules.  Please critique only the poem and not the poet. 
Thank you, 
—Quix

[rowens]

She said she’s higher than she’s ever been;
She says, the present tense would do some wonder if not wonders.

Or cut She.


Higher than she's ever been:
I
put her in the clouds.
Was it love? Or drugs?:
Still trying to figure
this
one out.


.....

Play around with it, like that.
You'll get results.



I put her in the clouds. 
Was it love or all the drugs?
Still trying to figure it all out. 
I used to think she was an angel,
but looking at it now
even the devil got his start
as a helper to the crown. 
There might’ve been some signs 
that she wasn’t who she seemed
but I think we’ve all been blinded 
by pretty little things.
[/quote]