Diary of A Procrastinator spoken word

[SPOKENDAWORD]

Hey I would appreciate some constructive criticism on this piece please.
It is entitled 
Diary of A Procrastinator
[Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1ZL6bjRN_Do&t=3s]
I want to know what i could have put in(different literary devices etc) so that i can make the others better.
Please tell me the time eg (0:52) where i could have put in something better. Thanks in advance for the feedback

these are the words but you may have to see the video to get my intonation

     Diary of a procrastinator

New year's day has long since past. past fast like my resolutions now.

You see I resolved that I will resolve my life

I told my self that I was no longer going to procrastinate to kill procrastination.

I cannot count how many times I may have aced an examination if I didn't first sacrifice my success

because I only succeed to nurture the seed of procrastination

Chained to thoughts of discontinuation.

Because my own thoughts make the insinuation that I can never beat

Procrastination, misprioritisation, discontinuation.

Leading to the habitual degradation of my mind’s own imagination, suffering with the disease of unwanted self-obligation self-manipulation and after subjective evaluation of the situation I realise it is without satisfaction

Diary of one who has mastered the art of procrastination.

 

Day 1 in grade 12 I had my motivation on 100

Now I dread the dead feeling of opening a book to study

Now it seems as though my anatomy is playing polygamy with my very own sensibility and my only ability is to satisfy the preferably self satisfactory tendency inside of me.

There are two forces good and evil fighting over me and I have to fight against the deficiency of my mortal feeble humanity.

What I want to do I don't do and that which I hate I do. I'm sick of me! Who can deliver me!

Im sick and tired of living a life of spiritual lethargy because my passions have gradually taken control of me

I'm sick and tired of wasting my time scrolling through a WhatsApp status while the status of my grades is lower than the profanities on your status but none of that matters does it?

I'm sick and tired of dreading to read my bible because I'm idle making an idol out of my time wasting capabilities.

Im sick and tired of postponing something for later because later is always the latter, I end up doing it after I have wasted all my time and mental energy.

I’m sick and tired of not knowing what is important. The only thing that is consistent is my insistent need for pleasure and leisure

Diary of a procrastinator.

My prayer for over a year was pleading with God to erase this sinful tenancy from inside of me. Because I have never learned how to use this God given self control ability. God gave me the power of choice but my choice is to only do what i hate doing

My knees are constantly throbbing with pain kneeling, pleading with God In disdain but it seemed as though my prayers were all in vain.

God I give up!

I give up trying to overcome this thing

I can't and would never be able to do it!

I give up embracing my internal infernal inferior interior and I will now trust in you the only superior exterior.

I will take on your behaviour and you already died to be my saviour.

I give up my tendency of dependency on my own strength and grasp your entire arms length.

I give up returning like a dog back to its own vomit

But I’m done trying I need you to help me stop it

From now on I'll trust in you and be exemplary because I trust in you, the extra-ordinary.

Because I now realise that you never made a promise toward me but only to my faith.

And the only way to grow my faith is to put you first and not 3rd 6th or 8th.

So when you say that you will not suffer me to be tempted above that which I am able. My faith is able to trust in you because you are able to help me become able to live a life that is not condemnable because where I am disabled you are enabled.

I also realise that faith without works is as alive as the bodies in a cemetery. But the only works that I deem necessary is making the effort to come to you the legendary and let your dispensary of love make a revolutionary change inside of me

Thank you God

Signed

Darion Cunningham

Diary of an overcomer

[TranquillityBase]

Hi Darion,

Before I comment, I should tell you this is a completely new thing for me.  I am not familiar with Spoken Word poetry, so I don't have anything to compare it to.

That said, your performance is exciting and though I watched it several times in order to think about what I might suggest, I never got tired of it.

I highlighted the text in this way:

Blue:  I thought these lines could use more rhymes in the lines, more intensity, like in the lines I've highlighted in green.
Green:  these are the sections I found most exciting in your performance, the lines I liked the most.
If you could make the blue sections more like these, with the same kind of intense rhyming that you use in my favorite parts, it would be improved.
Red: some stuff I think could be cut




Dear Diary
Diary of a procrastinator

New year's day has long since past. past fast like my resolutions now.
You see I resolved that I will resolve my life
I told my self that I was no longer going to procrastinate to kill procrastination.
I cannot count how many times I may have aced an examination if I didn't first sacrifice my success
because I only succeed to nurture the seed of procrastination

Chained to thoughts of discontinuation.
Because my own thoughts make the insinuation that I can never beat
Procrastination, misprioritisation, discontinuation.

Leading to the habitual degradation of my mind’s own imagination, suffering with the disease of unwanted self-obligation self-manipulation and after subjective evaluation of the situation I realise it is without satisfaction

Diary of one who has mastered the art of procrastination.
 
Day 1 in grade 12 I had my motivation on 100
Now I dread the dead feeling of opening a book to study
Now it seems as though my anatomy is playing polygamy with my very own sensibility and my only ability is to satisfy the preferably self satisfactory tendency inside of me.
There are two forces good and evil fighting over me and I have to fight against the deficiency of my mortal feeble humanity.
What I want to do I don't do and that which I hate doing, I do.

 I'm sick of me! Who can deliver me!
Im sick and tired of living a life of spiritual lethargy because my passions have gradually taken control of me
I'm sick and tired of wasting my time scrolling through a WhatsApp status while the status of my grades is lower than the profanities on your status but none of that matters does it?
I'm sick and tired of dreading to read my bible because I'm idle making an idol out of my time wasting capabilities.
Im sick and tired of postponing something for later because later is always the latter, I end up doing it after I have wasted all my time and mental energy.
I’m sick and tired of not knowing what is important. The only thing that is consistent is my insistent need for pleasure and leisure

Diary of a procrastinator.

My prayer for over a year was pleading with God to erase this sinful tenancy from inside of me. Because I have never learned how to use this God given self control ability. God gave me the power of choice but my choice is to only do what i hate doing
My knees are constantly throbbing with pain kneeling, pleading with God In disdain but it seemed as though my prayers were all in vain.
God I give up!
I give up trying to overcome this thing
I can't and would never be able to do it!
I give up embracing my internal infernal inferior interior and I will now trust in you the only superior exterior.
I will take on your behaviour and you already died to be my saviour.
I give up my tendency of dependency on my own strength and grasp your entire arms length.
I give up returning like a dog back to its own vomit
But I’m done trying I need you to help me stop it
From now on I'll trust in you and be exemplary because I trust in you, the extra-ordinary.
Because I now realise that you never gave me a promise but only a promise to my faith.
And the only way to grow my faith is to put you first and not 3rd 6th or 8th.
So when you say that you will not suffer me to be tempted above that which I am able. My faith is able to trust in you because you are able to help me become able to live a life that is not condemnable because where I am disabled you are enabled.
I also realize without faith it is impossible to please you.  I also realise that faith without works is as alive as the dead bodies in a cemetery. But the only works that I deem necessary is making the effort to come to you the legendary and let your dispensary of love make a revolutionary change inside of me

Thanks for sharing this with us.  Again, this is new to me, so keep that in mind.  I hope these few suggestions are of some help.

[busker]

I'll comment on this tomorrow...and tomorrow
But seriously, OP, could you please reformat the text so that it's in a readable font?