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Sweet Tooth
It's so hot
outside that a
bead of sweat
oozes between
your freckled
breasts, pooling
in your belly button.
Ah, the green
relief of shade.
You swirl your
tongue and lick
each side then
slide your mouth
slowly over, up
and down. The
pink circle of your
lips drips while the
sound of “mmm”
vibrates in your
throat. So sweet
so cold,
all
the
way
to
the
stick.
with a nod to W.C.W. "This Is Just To Say"
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Nice! Just one thing though: what made you want to write with line breaks like those?
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(05-07-2021, 05:13 AM)Majestic Sun Wrote: Nice! Just one thing though: what made you want to write with line breaks like those?
It's just a simplistic con-
crete poem
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(05-07-2021, 08:30 AM)Mark A Becker Wrote: (05-07-2021, 05:13 AM)Majestic Sun Wrote: Nice! Just one thing though: what made you want to write with line breaks like those?
It's just a simplistic con-
crete poem
Simplistically erotic, or maybe that's how my mind works. I was following that drop of perspiration and that tongue pretty carefully. Hated ending at a stick
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As "fun" as they come.
Gave me a...
brain
freeze.
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05-07-2021, 11:14 PM
(This post was last modified: 05-07-2021, 11:15 PM by RiverNotch.)
:flushed:
i hear when it comes to this sort of thing it's really to each their own. breasts and lips make me think the subject is a woman? but it seems to me it can be read otherwise. and concreteness -- is it supposed to be a pernus? and if it is, is the small thing supposed to be the mess? which case it feels kinda funny that the pernus points down than up, as if this is drippings, or even pee. idk if that's intentional xD
it's definitely felt -- see flaccid attempt at an emote -- but it's not for me. not florid enough xD
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(05-07-2021, 11:14 PM)RiverNotch Wrote: :flushed:
i hear when it comes to this sort of thing it's really to each their own. breasts and lips make me think the subject is a woman? but it seems to me it can be read otherwise. and concreteness -- is it supposed to be a pernus? and if it is, is the small thing supposed to be the mess? which case it feels kinda funny that the pernus points down than up, as if this is drippings, or even pee. idk if that's intentional xD
it's definitely felt -- see flaccid attempt at an emote -- but it's not for me. not florid enough xD
Hey Notch-
Yer way over thinking this piece.
It’s just not that complicated.
That said, interpret however you desire.
... Mark
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05-07-2021, 11:27 PM
(This post was last modified: 05-07-2021, 11:34 PM by RiverNotch.)
oh xD but it's a pleasure whatever the case
OH it's an ice lolly
