06-02-2017, 05:09 AM
Succubus
She came at me
with kisses like Jujubes
caked in coarse sugar;
my protests were toothless.
She came at me
with kisses like Jujubes
caked in coarse sugar;
my protests were toothless.
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Succubus
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My protests were toothless is a gripping image, toothless indicating biting in defense, unable to bite, a real nightmare. Food being a succubus, not sure what jujube is I took it for voodoo, interesting work!
You lost your teeth from all the sugar! And you can't stop cause it's delicious, nice work
Peanut butter honey banana sandwiches
06-06-2017, 10:03 PM
Ha! Love this.
Jujubes are chewy, sticky candies that glue to your teeth and need scraping off before the bacteria punches holes all over your enamel. I would not normally associate a succubus or kisses with sticky, gooing candy, so that was a nice surprise. The toothless protests at the end make the perfect punchline.
06-07-2017, 07:51 AM
JuJubes sounded like VooDoo to me. I guess they're a brand of candy that we call jubes? Fruit jubes?
Love the toothless ending - a toothless liion reminds me of something else - now what was it? |
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