Powerball
#1
Powerball

Your birthday is July 4;
I followed the fireworks to find you.
 
Your favorite number is 8;
the headless snowman, the infinite brushstroke.
 
I was 19
when I met you,
 
27
when we married,
 
34
when our boy was born,
 
and you are still my 10.
 
I am the luckiest man alive.

tongueincheek
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#2
Love it, I'm a sucker for a bit of sap, powerful title. Smile, looks like you're set for valentine's day, solid gift. Smile I particularly like the 8s.
billy wrote:welcome to the site. make it your own, wear it like a well loved slipper and wear it out. ella pleads:please click forum titles for posting guidelines, important threads. New poet? Try Poetic DevicesandWard's Tips

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#3
(01-15-2016, 06:52 PM)ellajam Wrote:  Love it, I'm a sucker for a bit of sap, powerful title. Smile, looks like you're set for valentine's day, solid gift. Smile I particularly like the 8s.
Thanks Ella. I was making a joke of course. I wanted to use the actual billion dollar PB numbers in the context of how people pick their numbers. Looking at it this morning, I'm thinking it would be much funnier if the last lines read:

...and if you were still a 10
I would be the luckiest man alive.

Paul
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#4
Yep, that's pretty funny, puts a whole other twist on it.
billy wrote:welcome to the site. make it your own, wear it like a well loved slipper and wear it out. ella pleads:please click forum titles for posting guidelines, important threads. New poet? Try Poetic DevicesandWard's Tips

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#5
Hey Paul,

I like the whole poem, but when I read these lines...

"Your favorite number is 8;
the headless snowman, the infinite brushstroke."

I thought they were pure class, especially 'the headless snowman'

I didn't get the 'Powerball' reference until I read your reply to Ella and I realised that it's the lottery. I'm so out of touch with reality.

Cheers for the read,

Mark
feedback award wae aye man ye radgie
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