Premature

[Todd]

The Bulge bloated
like that extra slice of cheesecake.
Nothing expansive:
the rack of lamb, red potatoes

of normal mothers
with smiles not sealed
behind pained zippers. It was a gallstone:
insipid anguish, nothing more

to be forgotten
not spoken beyond whispers.
It was astonishing
that this tinyredwrinkled thing could breathe

its wet wheezes.
No bigger than one of those asthmatic handbag
dogs, silent judges
and mocking with their pretty,

pale blue bows.
There would be no cigars, no handshakes,
no glad slaps on shoulders.
The room filled with pained grins,

vapid apologies,
like sitting constipated
in a public bathroom stall
listening for each quick rattle,

each agitated
successive
Bang!
As patrons come then go.

It lingered afterwards
like a bad meal in a greasy spoon.
You paid, and paid, and paid,
too sickened to eat, too guilty to leave

the Styrofoam box behind--
The damning evidence
of leftovers:
unwanted, undigested.

[billy]

now and then i read a good poem. seldom are the poems i read good enough for publishing.
this one really needs to be published. crying out for it even. this is the 2nd truly excellent piece i've read on here, jacks undressing anne sexton poem being the first.

all i can do about it is enthuse as to the imagery, the line breaks which at first lost me, cried out out to be read again and when they were, captured me (the reader) in a tightly woven piece of writing.

all great lines but if i had to pick one verse, it would be;

the Styrofoam box behind--
The damning evidence
of leftovers:
unwanted, undigested.

and what made the poem, was the essence of it was these lines that tied in with the title;

It was astonishing
that this tinyredwrinkled thing could breathe

its wet wheezes.
No bigger than one of those asthmatic handbag

thanks for a great read Todd. (jmo)

[Todd]

You're welcome! You're more than welcome. I appreciate the kind comments.

[heslopian]

The Bulge bloated
like that extra slice of cheesecake.
Nothing expansive:
the rack of lamb, red potatoes

of normal mothers
with smiles not sealed
behind pained zippers. It was a gallstone:
insipid anguish, nothing more

to be forgotten
not spoken beyond whispers.
It was astonishing
that this tinyredwrinkled thing could breathe

its wet wheezes.
No bigger than one of those asthmatic handbag
dogs, silent judges
and mocking with their pretty,

pale blue bows.
There would be no cigars, no handshakes,
no glad slaps on shoulders.
The room filled with pained grins,

vapid apologies,
like sitting constipated
in a public bathroom stall
listening for each quick rattle,

each agitated
successive
Bang!
As patrons come then go.

It lingered afterwards
like a bad meal in a greasy spoon.
You paid, and paid, and paid,
too sickened to eat, too guilty to leave

the Styrofoam box behind--
The damning evidence
of leftovers:
unwanted, undigested.

I agree with Billy, an astonishing piece of verse, ripe like a fresh apple with gorgeous imagery, and dark undertones; you create something so poignant from such a simple scenario. And, like Billy once again, all I can do is compliment the techniques you've used. The third from last stanza, for instance, boasts a highly effective arrangement of words, with the first two lines descending towards that third "bang!" The "bad meal in a greasy spoon" simile is just very good; relatable and somehow deep.
Perhaps part of the reason I feel such an affinity with this poem, why I love it so, is because I've been in the situation (I think) it describes many times myself, where I've been greedy with food and then regretted it. I've written many poems about that weakness of mine, my disgusting appetite, but none anywhere near as profound and beautiful as this.
Subtle, grim, vaguely perverse at times, this is perhaps the best poem that I've read on here, and I've read some good'uns

[kath3]

You had me all the way through, and I know nothing of poetry. I very much enjoyed it Todd.
And talk about eloquent writing ... my gosh Heslopian, just your comment to the poem captivated me.

[Todd]

Heslopian: I appreciate your kind words. Thank you so much.

Kath: I'm glad you enjoyed the poem. I appreciate your comments.

Best,

Todd