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Do as I say and nobody gets hurt

Do as I say and nobody gets hurt
Keith Offline
No Time On His Hands Now
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Posts: 848
Threads: 231
Joined: Oct 2012
#1
09-18-2015, 12:35 AM
Everybody get down on the floor
hands above your heads.
I wont tell you again
you're grammar is shit.

Don't you fucking move
or I'll cut out a stanza.

You! get down
and shut the fuck up.
I don't understand a word you're saying,
so move it.

You two old bastards
are a right pair of fucking rhymes,
don't make me capitalise your lines.

Now listen up,
everyone empty your pockets,
I want all your poetry
every scrap, note pad
and idea.
Come on shorty that means you as well,
what the fuck is this three line shite?
dig fucking deeper.

If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out
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Tiger the Lion Offline
The Whispered Roar
Posts: 751
Threads: 408
Joined: May 2014
#2
09-18-2015, 01:38 AM
This is why I never carry metaphors on my person.
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ellajam Offline
Consensually Agreeable
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Posts: 1,325
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Joined: Sep 2013
#3
09-18-2015, 01:49 AM
Hysterical  Hysterical
billy wrote:welcome to the site. make it your own, wear it like a well loved slipper and wear it out. ella pleads:please click forum titles for posting guidelines, important threads. New poet? Try Poetic DevicesandWard's Tips

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QDeathstar Offline
Sharpshooter
Posts: 417
Threads: 40
Joined: May 2014
#4
09-19-2015, 05:25 AM
Liane, I feel like this poem might be saying something original... I've came back three tunes just to reread it...



Nice work, keith
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Keith Offline
No Time On His Hands Now
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Posts: 848
Threads: 231
Joined: Oct 2012
#5
09-19-2015, 08:16 AM
(09-18-2015, 01:38 AM)Tiger the Lion Wrote:  This is why I never carry metaphors on my person.

A wise decision travellers similes are much safer Smile
(09-18-2015, 01:49 AM)ellajam Wrote:  Hysterical  Hysterical

Big Grin
(09-19-2015, 05:25 AM)Qdeathstar Wrote:  Liane, I feel like this poem might be saying something original... I've came back three tunes just to reread it...  



Nice work, keith

Many thanks Q glad you enjoyed it. Best Keith

If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out
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reason4real
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#6
09-20-2015, 09:58 PM
haha. humorous. got me engaged
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Keith Offline
No Time On His Hands Now
**********
Posts: 848
Threads: 231
Joined: Oct 2012
#7
09-21-2015, 01:02 AM
(09-20-2015, 09:58 PM)reason4real Wrote:  haha. humorous. got me engaged

Bloody hell, when's the wedding Wink

If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out
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Picasso
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#8
11-08-2015, 12:23 AM
Really well written. Great satire with a dark mood.
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Keith Offline
No Time On His Hands Now
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Posts: 848
Threads: 231
Joined: Oct 2012
#9
12-01-2015, 03:32 AM
(11-08-2015, 12:23 AM)Picasso Wrote:  Really well written. Great satire with a dark mood.

Thank you Picasso you are very kind.
Best Keith

If your undies fer you've been smoking through em, don't peg em out
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