The Great Reflection

[Mikeodial]

Wooden floorboards track shoe sizes, angst and growth,
Pine sits noisily and anonymously moves students dust, nature’s rain and snow,
around the lab, persistently supporting their progress, in this place of learning
… my refuge of years.

Now, a completed nest somehow perfectly surrounds me.
Like some giant physics experiment, disproving my own classroom words,
“Matter cannot be created or destroyed”
Technically I understand, reason drives all,
… save love and the need to do good.

So let’s dissect one last frog, one more experiment, measure one more isotope,
and see what registers on the Geiger counter of my humanity.
Reflecting on a life of much love, children, the desire to help others.
Was it for me or them, both perhaps?
… This knowledge is perhaps inside to discover.

[Regallis]

If matter cannot be created or destroyed, how did it every come to be? I really like this subject part, because it deals with conservation energy. I am working on a project concerning the ability to harness motion with conservation energy. Energy is in many forms, the only reason they say conservation energy can't be harnessed is because no has yet.

Yes it defies almost all aspects of current theories, but that is why we always try, to learn more and help prove different theories that are outside the box.

The affects of radiation of living things, how this can be a wonderful thing, or a dreadful weapon. We become more efficient at killing each other.

[Mikeodial]

If matter cannot be created or destroyed, how did it every come to be? I really like this subject part, because it deals with conservation energy. I am working on a project concerning the ability to harness motion with conservation energy. Energy is in many forms, the only reason they say conservation energy can't be harnessed is because no has yet.

Yes it defies almost all aspects of current theories, but that is why we always try, to learn more and help prove different theories that are outside the box.

The affects of radiation of living things, how this can be a wonderful thing, or a dreadful weapon. We become more efficient at killing each other.

Good point. My intention was to bring into question man's desire to solve the issue of creation through scientific explanation; and to encourage the reader to examine the metaphysical world within

[Regallis]

The greatest gift one can give is the gift of knowledge. To know what useless information is really very useful. I do like this poem. First I thought of basketball and growing, then changed to much grandeur things. I do believe there is a higher life form out there, but if they came by here they wouldn't stop because of what we are, the only ones that would stop are ones that are like us. If the universe is limitless then there are many possibilities to be found.

Then I wonder about the theory the universe is shrinking. So many things to ponder.

[alatos]

I just want to say that I love this poem. I know that's not really criticism per se, but just wanted to say keep it up.

[cfgorman]

Wooden floorboards track shoe sizes, angst and growth,
Pine sits noisily and anonymously moves students dust, nature’s rain and snow,
around the lab, persistently supporting their progress, in this place of learning
… my refuge of years.1st stanza, very nice. I can smell the classroom, feel it.

Now, a completed nest somehow perfectly surrounds me."somehow"? I don't think so.
Like some giant physics experiment, disproving my own classroom words,"Like some" too many words
“Matter cannot be created or destroyed”
Technically I understand, reason drives all,
… save love and the need to do good.

So let’s dissect one last frog, one more experiment, measure one more isotope,
and see what registers on the Geiger counter of my humanity. I like this
Reflecting on a life of much love, children, the desire to help others.
Was it for me or them, both perhaps?
… This knowledge is perhaps inside to discover.

I like the classroom images think they add a lot. Seems a little wordy in places as noted. The question at the end sums it up for me. Good job

[Mikeodial]

Wooden floorboards track shoe sizes, angst and growth,
Pine sits noisily and anonymously moves students dust, nature’s rain and snow,
around the lab, persistently supporting their progress, in this place of learning
… my refuge of years.

Now a perfect nest surrounds and applauds a life … family.
My giant science experiment, disproving classroom words,
“Matter cannot be created or destroyed”
Technically I understand, reason drives all,
… save love and the need to do good.

So let’s dissect one last frog, one more experiment, measure one more isotope,
and see what registers on the Geiger counter of my humanity.
Reflecting on a life of much love, children, the desire to help others.
Was it for me or them, both perhaps?
… This knowledge is perhaps inside to discover.


Thank you for the input ...

Wooden floorboards track shoe sizes, angst and growth,
Pine sits noisily and anonymously moves students dust, nature’s rain and snow,
around the lab, persistently supporting their progress, in this place of learning
… my refuge of years.1st stanza, very nice. I can smell the classroom, feel it.

Now, a completed nest somehow perfectly surrounds me."somehow"? I don't think so.
Like some giant physics experiment, disproving my own classroom words,"Like some" too many words
“Matter cannot be created or destroyed”
Technically I understand, reason drives all,
… save love and the need to do good.

So let’s dissect one last frog, one more experiment, measure one more isotope,
and see what registers on the Geiger counter of my humanity. I like this
Reflecting on a life of much love, children, the desire to help others.
Was it for me or them, both perhaps?
… This knowledge is perhaps inside to discover.

I like the classroom images think they add a lot. Seems a little wordy in places as noted. The question at the end sums it up for me. Good job

[Codry]

Wooden floorboards track shoe sizes, angst and growth,
Pine sits noisily and anonymously moves students dust, nature’s rain and snow,
around the lab, persistently supporting their progress, in this place of learning
… my refuge of years.

Now, a completed nest somehow perfectly surrounds me.
Like some giant physics experiment, disproving my own classroom words,
“Matter cannot be created or destroyed”
Technically I understand, reason drives all,
… save love and the need to do good.

So let’s dissect one last frog, one more experiment, measure one more isotope,
and see what registers on the Geiger counter of my humanity.
Reflecting on a life of much love, children, the desire to help others.
Was it for me or them, both perhaps?
… This knowledge is perhaps inside to discover.

Lack of structure ... the phrases are too long(don't forget capitals at the beginning of the line), the ideas don't flow organically you jump too fast from one image to the next, It feels like a short story of an idea rather than poetry, say more with less words.