don't have one yet.

[moose]

A summer breeze drifts through the soft wavy hair of the Angel that looks into my eyes. She stares. The deep trance penetrates my heart like an arrow. I feel as though im being carried to the sky on clouds.I learn forward with nervousness.the glisten from her wet lips intrigues me closer. I feel the warmth of her breath on my lips.I close my eyes and move closer and closer, then...nothing.I open my eyes. She is gone.

[rowens]

You could fix a few things. Spelling, spaces between punctuation and words.

[R.C. KITCHENS]

A summer breeze drifts through the soft wavy hair of the Angel that looks into my eyes. She stares. The deep trance penetrates my heart like an arrow. I feel as though im being carried to the sky on clouds.I learn forward with nervousness.the glisten from her wet lips intrigues me closer. I feel the warmth of her breath on my lips.I close my eyes and move closer and closer, then...nothing.I open my eyes. She is gone.

I took a second to space out your poem and feel it reads better.

A summer breeze drifts through the soft wavy hair
of the Angel that looks into my eyes.
She stares.
The deep trance penetrates my heart like an arrow.
I feel as though im being carried to the sky on clouds.
I learn forward with nervousness.
the glisten from her wet lips intrigues me closer.
I feel the warmth of her breath on my lips.
I close my eyes and move closer and closer,
then...nothing.
I open my eyes.
She is gone.

"penetrates my heart like an arrow" seems cliche to me. so does "carried to the sky on clouds" I also think "bring's" is more suitable than "intrigues". I think you could just say "I close my eyes and move closer" then... nothing.

Its proper etiquette to provide poetry critique before posting your own poetry. If you get a chance review some poems and leave feedback. Welcome.
[/quote]

[billy]

A summer breeze drifts through the soft wavy hair of the Angel that looks into my eyes. She stares. The deep trance penetrates my heart like an arrow. I feel as though im being carried to the sky on clouds.I learn forward with nervousness.the glisten from her wet lips intrigues me closer. I feel the warmth of her breath on my lips.I close my eyes and move closer and closer, then...nothing.I open my eyes. She is gone.

please leave some feedback elsewhere before posting in the novice, mild, or serious critique forums. thank you

[moose]

Thanks for the input. I haven't done anything closely related to poetry since high school which I graduated 4 years ago. I kinda found this as a sort of comfort since my gf of 3 yrs just broke up with me. So I appreciate the feedback and ill try to give ppl the same amount of feedback that id want.