and be my home

[tectak]

Will you be my home,
so that I'm not alone, this is not as poignant as i would wish it to be. It is partly the conceptual difficulty in trying to anthropomorphise the inanimacy of bricks and mortar and partly the "home alone" thing. Perhaps just "Will you be AT home" would work better? Now and forever!
when my time comes to die?
I’ll have no family by my side,
to offer comfort and hold my hand.
My parents have long been in their graves;
neither have I siblings alive to ask for aid. I am sorry, but to me this is the beggar, dog and placard scenario... " Spare a dime,wife and family to support"
My wife went on long before,
and children I once had are now no more.
When I stand at the entrance of death’s door,
will you succor me; be my last refuge,If I had not already disavowed you of the personification of "home" this would be a nice hyperspacelink....as it is. I am not sure. I may have to retract. No. I won't.
the vultures then to disabuse,Again,and logically, what you are saying here is will you be my refuge/shelter/home (structural edifices made of some solid matter) then by some human "act" further down, fend off the vultures. It doesn't hang together.
as I lie helpless in my bed
keep them from picking at my head?
I will give you all I own,
for this simply act alone:
let me lie among familiar things,
for the comfort that it brings,
and be my home?

©2012 –Erthona

Note:

From a series of poems on death and dying, along with "The Final Hour".

I like it for all the wrong reasons. It is on many levels as poignant as it could get IF it were a caricature of a simple man approaching a lonely death. The trouble is you have not convinced me that it is so. It reads like an erudite poet trying to write like a simple man approaching a lonely death.....in this you have succeeded. Hmmmm.... now I have confused myself......which is not good.
Best,
Tectak.
PS My "New Age" is so good that no one can find anything to crit it on. Though I am mighty proud of the achievement, I cannot believe it is that good. It is about approaching death. That is why I mentioned it.