10-28-2011, 08:22 AM
i purposely didn't respond till now. the reason is, i wasn't sure what to say.
i wasn't sure what my take on the poem actually was. the last stanza feels like a degas, the opening stanza, a Monet; at least the first line does. i think you gave the reader too much and in doing so, too little in the 2nd stanza. (mainly L3 and 4 of it) i like that it pulls me towards painters i know but hate that i'm not sure why. remember Don McLean's "Vincent" ? this feels like it wants to be similar but doesn't achieve the act as much. i wasn't to like it but am still on the fence and not sure if i should pick one side over the other. jmo.
wish i could have been more helpful mark
thanks for the read.