10-12-2011, 07:39 AM
I nearly suggested 'life' but that's the way you start the poem so I'm not sure. I keep thinking maybe you should take the possessive away entirely and just leave: 'an empty place, yet full of secrets'
That's just a suggestion but i think you can see what I mean. The title states 'cave' and the first line and the last line seem to seal up the possessive references without having to explicitly state that your heart is the cave. JMO of course
That's just a suggestion but i think you can see what I mean. The title states 'cave' and the first line and the last line seem to seal up the possessive references without having to explicitly state that your heart is the cave. JMO of course