the wave tossed as pearl harbour was attacked (an image i had, as ships lifted out of the water and broke) maybe i could have been cleaner wit the image, i'll take a look.
the enjambment thing you mention, i saw it but hoped it would pass muster because it is a complete sentence. with cap and period.
and like all before you "crystal" seems to be a spoke to change. (which i will )
as always, thanks for the feedback, it's always helpful.
at present i changed crystal to limpid, hope it removes the cliche aspect.
the enjambment thing you mention, i saw it but hoped it would pass muster because it is a complete sentence. with cap and period.
and like all before you "crystal" seems to be a spoke to change. (which i will )
as always, thanks for the feedback, it's always helpful.
at present i changed crystal to limpid, hope it removes the cliche aspect.