Selene and the boy

[Ca ne fait rien]

Lovely imagery in this one... the lights in the dark lends an ethereal drama to the scene, but it isn't overdone either. I love the dogs circling part... it just adds something unexpected and mysterious.

reading it over again, i would have to say the line "twilight falls" is unnecessary, just imo. You already established september evening which is enough to transition to the rising moon later. In truth, I think the entire third stanza can be removed without much problem, since the fourth stanza offers up a more effective image of lights in the distance, delineating the far edges of the scene .

Also, in the 5th stanza, "a helium balloon; floating up to clear sky" is an image that imo works better for daytime the nighttime. I do appreciate that it brings a sort of levity, however I don't get levity from the tone of any of your other lines, which for me heightens that sense that the balloon was just fitted in as a filler line. I'd suggest removing the balloon part, and trying to work in the harvest moon breaking the horizon either into stanza for or 6 (preferably stanza 6, the last--- harvest moon breaking the horizon perfectly compliments the image of a stone skimming and "breaking" the water)

Those are just my two suggestions. Feel free to ignore if they don't work for you

Thank you ver much, Addy, I will think carefully about your suggestions and have a bit of a play about.