rinsed

[billy]

[2nd draft]

cautiously
she waited near the gushing reservoir
swiftly
thoughts rush through life
as piqued sunshine paints forging waters
in dullest gray revelations

of what this mundane union had become

---

with such a short poem, everything should count.
the last three lines, specially the penultimate hold a good strong image,
it feels like an artist is at work.
the first feels a litte too tell. jmo
nice poem thanks for the read












[/quote]