Deer on Mill Hill at Nightfall

[Todd]

Well a lot of comments already (which I'm deliberately not reading so that it doesn't influence me )

To the lines:

Running home to beat the dark--I like this idea of racing the advancing dark
across an ocean of meadow grass--this feels a bit static for an ocean of meadow(I keep wanting to fit something like ripple/rippling into this. Something to keep the movement going
knees rip ankles turn and tangle--knees rip feels a bit awkward to me
boots stumble the furrows
along the stubble field.--like these to lines

On Mill Hill the earth is ploughed
already chain- harrowed. Blood pounds--I like chain-harrowed
seabreezes steal breath--salt breezes would be a good way to engage another sense. Just a thought
feet heavy clay- clarted--the extra spacing after the hypen seems wrong
stop a moment gauge position.

Up wind--one word
three roe deer break cover
from twisted whitethorn bushes
freeze on the brow
black against the violet sky--nice
poise on the point
of that split second--like the use of that
that separates
Day from night.

.

I liked this. I thought it was a solid read. Hopefully there will be something in these comments you might find useful.

Best,

Todd