maybe death has no meaning

[billy]

Sylvia Plath with her head in the stove
like Alice with her legs poking out of the hole.

John Berryman falling from the bridge
like a nickel tossed over someone's balcony.

Ian Curtis tying his noose to the sound
of his wife departing down the drive.

Kurt Cobain cocking his shotgun
as Boddah* slowly waves goodbye.

Sarah Kane dangling from a shoelace
while nurses smoke ciggies outside.

"There's something in all this, I'm sure..."

When I was fifteen I believed in meaning.
Now I believe the abyss is shallow,
that the stars sometime shine, and sometimes they don't.

*Childhood imaginary friend, whom his suicide note was addressed to.

while the couplets are great in themselves i feel i want more (not sure what of maybe a bit of enlightenment) the first two in particular gave poignant images

the last three lines work well and do assist me in seeing there's been a transition from black to grey
and that the 1st person in them has somehow realized that while life is never a bowl of cherries, there are
cherries to be found now and again and if only a few. in turn; life is worth living

my problem is that if the last verse is meant as a continuation from the line above, then i got it completely wrong
and it means the ist person in the last verse did them self in because there just weren't enough cherries all the time.,

while ambiguity can be good i feel a need some connection from the great couplets to the good three liner.

thanks for the read jack