Visit
#7
(02-15-2022, 03:44 PM)Semicircle Wrote:  Midsummer's day,
sun beams through a sunken shack,

over the silhouette of the cock
weathervane, looming
out back.

Thick misshapen fence,
Old gate opens with a sigh
dead yellow jackets
floating in the crooked bird bath
Grass overgrown, dry.

Bent stake in the ground
faded leash still attached.
Nest in the branches
eggs never hatched.
I also like the desolate mood of this one; a few words I would cut.  I'm a little uneasy about those unhatched eggs at the end for some reason.  
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Messages In This Thread
Visit - by Semicircle - 02-15-2022, 03:44 PM
RE: Visit - by Knot - 02-15-2022, 11:22 PM
RE: Visit - by Semicircle - 02-15-2022, 11:52 PM
RE: Visit - by Mark A Becker - 02-16-2022, 01:39 AM
RE: Visit - by Semicircle - 02-16-2022, 03:08 AM
RE: Visit - by Mark A Becker - 02-16-2022, 05:36 AM
RE: Visit - by TranquillityBase - 02-17-2022, 08:18 AM



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