A Giant’s Footsteps

[Oden Prufrock]

A Giant’s Footsteps

I sense silver scales bristle under my skin, good image, but doesn't quite fit together IMHO (see below); also, colon or em-dash rather than comma could work better here
They appeared from my ventures in the world, if under skin, how can they "appear," i.e. become visible?  and again, punctuation other than comma since the next line comments on this one
Knowing the time is right, they come, perhaps "their" or "this" rather than "the?"
A sign that the future grows more radiant with each step, remove "that;" might consider a period here.
I feel surging, spirit-defining joy at this journey, "at" is nice (looking over the whole upcoming journey) but consider "in"
For the boy I see come from the tar and muck is a giant, suggest "arise from" instead of "come from the" and colon instead of comma
He forms from nature and corrects himself by his will, perhaps reverse phrasing, i.e. "and by his will corrects himself" and a period to end the line.
The moon smiles on his strength, a very good line!
His solitude in the darkness gives him focus while he trains, suggest deleting "the" and the comma
To take the teeth of chaos into his flesh, suggest "accept" and "in" replacing "take" and "iinto" - and, again, remove the comma
And never be destroyed by despair or weakness, consider removing "and" as well as reversing to "weakness and despair" and a period at the end.
He may pound the earth like an angry bull out of his pain, consider "in" replacing "out of his," and a colon replacing the comma
He may give into the weight of the world, should be " in to" - and, again, colon instead of comma
He may singe his legs with the heat of his speed against the wind, a very good line, could remove "the" and end with a period.
Such is the metamorphosis from the bully to an immortal man, suggest removing "the" and "an," and the comma
Who lives on in the hearts he empowers.   good closing line, might consider removing "the" and changing slightly for rhythm - "in hearts his life empowers" or "in hearts that he empowers"

In intensive critique, see above for specifics, generalities follow.  (Hope the specifics are not excessive.)

In general, place each use of "the" under suspicion for removal or replacement with a more specific word and match line-ending punctuation to the flow of the work rather than ending every one with a comma.

On your first line, I get a contradiction between fish-like scales (which are smooth) and "bristling" (which is sharp and scratchy), except maybe a pangolin's (the scale of which are sharp, but rather large and not silver).  And, as noted, below the skin but somehow visible since they "appear."  The line is (and should be) a grabber, but I find its images confusing.

Also in general, the traditional typography of beginning each line/verse with a capital letter is disparaged on this site as archaic.  I disagree mildly, but you might consider capitalizing only where required by sentence structure (as modified by punctuation, see above) just to see how you like it.  I think this would improve the reading, in conjunction with line-ending punctuation to direct it.

I don't comment on the progression from first person to discussion of a third person.  You might examine the transition to be sure it's what you want.

Overview:  I get vibes of "Leaves of Grass" as well as "If" here as well as an old Mormon idea of a man raising himself to god-status by his own efforts (which may no longer be current).  Interesting, challenging, maybe inspiring.  Thanks for posting, looking forward to your edits.

Thanks for your feedback. I applied most edits and added a new line to make the scales image clearer. Would I repost the poem or edit the thread or reply to it?