ALEX CHANCE MCCONNEL

[Cassiopeia88]

Well this is my hello
This is my goodbye
It's hard to say these things
I'll always wonder why
You would have been a joy
I know you'd make me proud
But life didn't quite give you the chance
To really come around  This is badly put, it sounds that is phrased this way just for the rhyme's sake
I love the name your mother gave you
I know shes very sad
But the fact she got to know you  Unless for the emphasis effect, I wouldn't use "you" twice and try to make it sound as a rhyme
It really makes her glad
She didn't see your face
Or know quite who you'd be
Just like the rest of the would
Who didn't get to see
But tho they may not know you
There's few who'll never forget
Like me, I promise you  Too much you
I'll always be your proud Aunt.
I may have never known your gender
Or got to hold you in my arms
But that doesn't mean your not real   you're
That doesn't mean your forever gone
Maybe from this Earth
You'll never get to be
But one day in heaven
Ill be there for you to see

While I like sad topics and this is certainly very sad (you have my wholesome sympathy), it's just too simple for me. At times, it sounds more as a confession than a poem. Rhymes are too simple and kind of forced. Still, I'm also a beginner so I'm learning too. do hope writing will help to reduce the pain though.