First Edit: Alone Together

First Edit: Alone Together

Richard Offline

WTF

Posts: 709
Threads: 74
Joined: Mar 2017

09-13-2017, 09:26 PM

Hey Ellajam,
Thanks for the feedback. I was a bit unsure about the temptation line myself. I was wondering if it's one of those times where it sounds nice, but the meaning is a bit muddled. I wasn't 100% happy with the ending either, so I really like your suggestion there.

Thanks again,
Richard

Time is the best editor.

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Messages In This Thread

First Edit: Alone Together - by Richard - 09-13-2017, 12:50 PM

RE: Alone Together - by ellajam - 09-13-2017, 06:59 PM

RE: Alone Together - by Richard - 09-13-2017, 09:26 PM

RE: Alone Together - by Todd - 09-14-2017, 03:38 AM

RE: Alone Together - by vagabond - 09-14-2017, 04:35 AM

RE: Alone Together - by Richard - 09-14-2017, 06:58 AM

RE: First Edit: Alone Together - by Richard - 09-18-2017, 05:27 AM

RE: First Edit: Alone Together - by Todd - 09-20-2017, 05:26 AM

RE: First Edit: Alone Together - by Richard - 09-20-2017, 10:53 AM

RE: First Edit: Alone Together - by Richard - 01-05-2020, 02:57 AM

RE: First Edit: Alone Together - by Knot - 01-06-2020, 08:13 PM

RE: First Edit: Alone Together - by Richard - 01-11-2020, 12:13 PM

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