When My Son Asks About My Worst Experience (Revision 2)

[Wjames]

Revision

I imagine that God is shaking 
a Magic 8-Ball and my tongue is shifting strong opening.
between: Ask again later, and Better not 
tell you now.
Instead of a lie detector, 
I’m hooked to a seismograph. I think these two lines could be stronger in reverse order, "I'm hooked to a seismograph/instead of a lie detector.

The needle begins to move

so quickly that the building collapses 
like a sand castle, next a city block,
and then Superman forgets to unwind time. I think you could cut one of "and" or "then".
Lex Luthor’s plan finally succeeds. The whole state
slides into the ocean. I want to tell
him that I can’t remember 
any of their faces, and names have smoothed 
like river stones too long submerged. Perhaps
instead of an earthquake, I don't think this line really adds anything.

the needle is drawing a picture

of what might happen, 
or what’s already happened. Nice, what might happen when you tell him (could that supplant the narrator's worst experience?) , and what it is you would tell him.
I want to tell him the truth. No,
I don’t want to ask him any questions. I think
I’m only lying to myself.

If I even whisper,
the sky would shatter like glass.

Original

I imagine that God is shaking
a Magic 8-Ball and my tongue is shifting
between: Ask again later, and Better not 
tell you now.
Instead of a lie detector, 
I’m hooked to a seismograph.
The needle begins to move
so quickly that the building collapses
like a sand castle, next a city block,
and then Superman forgets to unwind time.
Lex Luthor’s plan finally succeeds. The whole state
slides into the ocean. I want to tell
him that there are days I don’t want to die, 
that I can’t remember any of their faces, 
and names have smoothed like river stones
too long submerged. Perhaps
the needle is drawing a picture
of what might happen, 
or what’s already happened. If I even whisper,
the sky would shatter like glass.
 
I want to tell him the truth. No,
I don’t want to ask him any questions. I think
I’m only lying to myself.

This is an interesting concept for a poem, and it's executed well. My critiques were all surface level stuff, I like it.