Edit 1: Banality

[CRNDLSM]

I wrote the whole thing out to try and put myself in the narrator's mind.

Through streets littered with 
tin cans and chit-chat,
I’m making my way home
on a mellow Tuesday evening. This is the setting
While I wait for a train
that goes my direction,
I decide to add to the mess I wouldn't consider any of this a mess, everything's in place, another day
by lighting up a cigarette.
I inhale deeply as
my lips kiss the bud;
stale smoke numbing my throat
a feeling like that of a sore love-story.this line could prolly be replaced by a feeling like that of a sore love-story.
Moments pass by like pedestrians
when I spot a faint rumble spot is repeated in cases of sight, and through your poem you refer to sounds as distinct, how about an equivalent for rumble
coming from a near distance;
Pa-dum-dum, Pa-dum-dum, Pa-dum-dum

Writing it out felt like a prose story with basic sentence structuring, a lot more room for elaboration in the same amount of space.

 
It’s that distinct sound
of going home,
presented by a carriage
that is marked with graffiti
and the occasional spot of rust.
It slowly grinds to a halt
with a loud screech and a whir.
Its gates squeak openreally like everything about the train
and out steps its guard.
He dons that unmistakable
silly hat and uniform, the first time read this I wondered, 'why are the police here? I was mistaken
colored black and blue respectively. Black hat, blue uniform, and respectively like respect the position
He asks for my destination,
to which I softly reply;
“Home, Sir, to Nessingway station".
I show him my ticket
to which he approvingly nods. The sentence structure is banal
I crack an awkward smile
while I step inside.
My eye catches a vacant seat
through the cluttered crowd; I guess this is a mess sorry
A rugged leather couch with
a piece of fabric tearing out.
I sit down and rest my head
against the glass, staring through.
As the train slowly starts moving,
making that ubiquitous hum: and I like ubiquitous him and all the paddumdum
Pad-dum-dum, Pa-dum-dum, Pa-dum-dum
 
Through the stained windows
I spot my vague reflection.
Together we see the sunset
accompanied by an ever-changing décor.
As if the credits from the end
 of a movie roll through
with a clichéd title like:
“Another day", starring myself
while the rails take me
to the end of my destination. Is the destination the end, or the beginning, if it will end.
Instead of the screen turning black,
I get up and step outside,
spotting my reflection in the glass
one final time, while saying under my breath:
“Goodbye and until tomorrow”
The train slowly drifts off
yonder towards a setting sun,
bidding me farewell with that distinct sound:
Pa-dum-dum, Pa-dum-dum, Pa-dum-dum

Nice setting and tone, and use of onomanopeia