Limbo

[Radetof.Yahska]

can't decide if your love's become poison or soma                  
it's typical tobacco teamed with cold coffee                          This line feels a little loose... typical tobacco?
crutches on which we navigate our particle of the cosmos      Sagan would be proud. I like the props bit.
warm light beaming through the shutters                             Feels a little disconnected from the previous sentence. A space is needed
it's morning and we've sinned again                                     Good end

While it starts with an overdone omelette of a line (it reminded me of the people who wrote "Love is sweet poison" on slambooks), I really likes where it goes after. I get this image of a dusty room, light falling on a naked body on the bed, and a shady guy in a hat sitting in a chair, smoking and drinking. A murderer vibe, too, for some reason, and an old school, hard living feel. I really enjoyed it for reasons I cannot fully comprehend. All you need is to tighten that middle bit, and I think it'd be great.