THREATS

[headybeach]

Haha, I'm really loving the humorous vibes on this poem! I think the rhyme you chose definitely fits it well since it kind of plays into the feeling of angry, pacing thoughts that the poem has! I agree with the small grammatical things that others have pointed out, for example the pronoun in the first stanza. The only other thing I'd have to say is that, since the rhyme scheme you use for the middle three stanzas requires their first two lines two be real short, it kind of forces those two lines to show off the building up of anger, compared to your stanzas' final lines where the anger explodes a little bit and seeps into the faster feeling sentences. Because each stanza follows this pattern, it almost feels like, with the start of each stanza, the anger/frustration has been stunted and kind of dissipated and has to build up again, which I think kind of breaks the progression of the poem. But, I think that you could keep the progression of anger going by filling those beginning lines with more and more syllables each stanza to give them a feeling of increasing anger as the poem progresses. The punchline is hilarious, though! I love it! I think this poem is really cute and lovingly funny! Thanks for sharing!