WE Have Become

[Sparkydashforth]

Thanks theredbaron,

I think I could ditch that cinder-block line with no great loss ---- will ponder

Cheers!

It's interesting and engaging. I really like the end. What I'd suggest changing is here:

for I am as solid as particleboard and cinder-block.
I am the speedometer in an old mans head,

The words particleboard, speedometer and maybe cinder-block don't sound well with respect to the established tonality.