How to weave a donkey Edit 1

[advocaite]

I would like to say I like it, very thought provoking for me.
i really enjoyed this part

The weave first forms
where the chords split,
raw and red from the separation.
Skeins of skin that cross the wide divide.

In the far distance, along the linear lines
an end stop
can be conceived;

I cant express really why,but it draws me in the most. As much as i would like to critise you i dont feel i know enough to do so but if pointing out parts that draw me in helps you in any way i hope you liek the feedback