10-09-2015, 08:26 PM
(03-15-2015, 09:25 AM)Tiger the Lion Wrote: first thawI really enjoy the strong image of this. The twist doesn't quite work for me because I can't see "first thaw" as an absolute positive, in some places it could mean the flooding of ice break or some other disaster. I think if you could make that line a clear positive expectation it might work better. Maybe a title of City 'Ku.
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But on the whole it worked for me, I got it.
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