When I Say I Love You

[summermoose]

-sorry if this is a bit of a long read-

I.

I don’t mean it like they do.

It implies no perfection,
even in my eyes.

It does not offer chains
and will not make you pancakes.

It does not mark territory
in your mind
or body.

It needs only itself,
and does not consume nor sacrifice.

I tell you I love you,
like I show you a scar.

Seeking no justice.
I love you.


II.

You became in me.
And I feel you, as I feel myself.
And I want for you
beyond my self.

I don’t plainly want the best for you.
I want your life to be beauty,
in that deeply selfish way
we know only of ourselves.

I don’t want to make you happy.
I want you to find your peace,
in its silent rhythm beyond context.

I don’t want you to endure.
I want you to live beyond burdens
like me. And like you.

No I do not feel close to you.
As I do not feel close to my skin.
You are me more than language admits.