What Do Lilacs Smell Like?

[ellajam]

lilacs sweetened the air,
or rather the canned scent they shove
into bottles and pump
into motel rooms.
we turned on classic rock
to make us feel defiant
and drank bourbon because it
tastes like sorrow.
we danced in the dark,
too drunk to turn on the lights,
or maybe just afraid of what we might see.

Hi, Liz, excellent title. It really works to achieve the line between the desired and the actual experience. I'd prefer the first line to use Lilac, what the scent is called as opposed to the reality of lilacs, it would also stress the contrast between the title and the poem.

I particularly like bourbon tasting like sorrow. The other thing is I'd prefer the poem in present tense, and I think you could lose "or rather", so with very little change you have this:

lilac sweetens the air,
the canned scent they shove
into bottles and pump
into motel rooms.
we turn on classic rock
to make us feel defiant
and drink bourbon because it
tastes like sorrow.
we dance in the dark,
too drunk to turn on the lights,
or maybe just afraid of what we might see.

or

Lilac sweetens the air,
the canned scent they shove
into bottles and pump
into motel rooms.
We turn on classic rock
to make us feel defiant
and drink bourbon because it
tastes like sorrow.
We dance in the dark,
too drunk to turn on the lights,
or maybe just afraid of what we might see.

Just a thought, see what you think. Thanks for posting it, again, very effective title, well done.