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Endometriosis
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06-18-2015, 12:23 AM
Haha, I like your content! I might be wrong here, but the way the beginnings of your lines read are a little dull. We, you, I, the, but, what... See what I mean? A little predictable, I'd break up the starts of lines in a more original way like: "what I hate the most" hating the most... Or something. I hope that was helpful, I look forward to reading your revision!
I relish writing bad poems, if it means someday I'll write a good one.
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| Messages In This Thread |
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Endometriosis - by staciamberdawn - 06-06-2015, 08:03 AM
RE: Endometriosis - by Observer - 06-06-2015, 08:29 AM
RE: Endometriosis - by Todd - 06-06-2015, 10:57 AM
RE: Endometriosis - by Erthona - 06-06-2015, 01:02 PM
RE: Endometriosis - by staciamberdawn - 06-06-2015, 01:32 PM
RE: Endometriosis - by tectak - 06-06-2015, 09:11 PM
RE: Endometriosis - by Erthona - 06-07-2015, 12:30 PM
RE: Endometriosis - by Merrikay - 06-18-2015, 12:23 AM
RE: Endometriosis - by ChristopherSea - 06-18-2015, 11:03 PM
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