Dusty -revised
#12
Thanks, Billy. then mist has covered the traces  - then has gone.
Which of the rhymes aren't working, do you think?

let’s laugh and listen to the drip this line and the two above it work well as a unit within the poem but now the self is the two selves.?

no, not two selves, but a partner.

I'm having great trouble with the fonts on here all of a sudden!
Before criticising a person try walking a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticise that person, you are a mile away.... and you have their shoes.
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Messages In This Thread
Dusty -revised - by ray - 10-15-2014, 12:42 AM
RE: Dusty - by billy - 10-15-2014, 01:21 AM
RE: Dusty - by ray - 10-15-2014, 06:16 AM
RE: Dusty - by billy - 10-15-2014, 05:26 PM
RE: Dusty - by ellajam - 10-15-2014, 06:55 AM
RE: Dusty - by ellajam - 10-15-2014, 11:27 AM
RE: Dusty - by bena - 10-15-2014, 05:38 PM
RE: Dusty - by ray - 10-15-2014, 07:57 PM
RE: Dusty - by billy - 10-15-2014, 08:48 PM
RE: Dusty - by billy - 10-16-2014, 01:59 AM
RE: Dusty -revised - by ray - 10-16-2014, 05:56 AM
RE: Dusty -revised - by ellajam - 10-16-2014, 06:09 AM
RE: Dusty -revised - by ray - 10-16-2014, 06:03 AM
RE: Dusty -revised - by billy - 10-16-2014, 08:50 PM
RE: Dusty -revised - by billy - 10-16-2014, 08:32 PM
RE: Dusty -revised - by ray - 10-17-2014, 06:01 AM



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