On Postponing the Bar Exam

[milo]

Hello and welcome to the site.

Our Crim Law professor told a story

you use the vernacular here. I assume the purpose is to establish familiarity with the subject matter (to the point of contempt) but I wonder if it is worth the distraction presented in reading.

about a robber who shot point blank
into pillows believing it was his enemy.

the odd break on "blank" along with the grammar error create some confusion here. Also, "robber" isn't really a title. i would expect something more specific. i don't think "robbers" exist so i would be surprised to hear a Crim law professor recounting a story about one.

It didn’t matter, the man was dead already.

/what/ didn't matter? That he told a story? That the man shot pillows? That he was a robber?

The professor, an Irishman, drank all semester
from the same cup, which may very well
not have been water, to quell the sweat
forming along his Polo shirt.

Once again, the linebreaks are used to poor effect. The incorrect grammar suggests that he drank out of a cup that may have been made of water(?). The causality, once again, between "to quell . . ." isn't tied properly. The whole thing reads way too prosy

.

And, for a moment, when he stopped,

why "And"? What did he stop? Drinking? Telling a random story? Sweating?

the light held still on those chairs.

what light? what chairs? I see it continues in this fashion for a long long time but I am stopping here for now.

Thanks.