Photo-Ops
#2
i get that we often act for the camera, the dissent and cheese part though, seemed to come out of left field and for me needs a better transition, the title worked at first but by the end not so much. sorry i could help more.
oh...try and use a constant meter at present it reads a bit disjointedly.

(08-07-2014, 12:11 PM)Wjames Wrote:  Flash your teeth and force a pose, the opening line works well with the title
pretend you fit their upscale clothes;
this cost a lot of money, don’t complain.

Remember pictures not events,
so frame the thoughts that cast dissent
and eat the cheese they feed you off the floor. not sure where the last two lines connect to the theme of the poem.
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Messages In This Thread
Photo-Ops - by Wjames - 08-07-2014, 12:11 PM
RE: Photo-Ops - by billy - 08-07-2014, 05:29 PM
RE: Photo-Ops - by bena - 08-08-2014, 02:05 AM
RE: Photo-Ops - by Wjames - 08-09-2014, 03:54 AM



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