Eternity Awaits
#5
I have no idea what "langloon" is, or "fowering" ditto 'fapping".

I think I would footnote "Doon" as that is a little obscure.

"gorse" I can see but "gribble" makes no sense to me,
in this context.

It's kind of difficult to get much from the poem with some many words that are either misspelled, misused, or obscure. Plus most of your two liners don't seem connected to the rest of the poem.

Dale
How long after picking up the brush, the first masterpiece?

The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.
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Messages In This Thread
Eternity Awaits - by poe - 06-07-2014, 02:42 AM
RE: Eternity Awaits - by ellajam - 06-12-2014, 12:06 AM
RE: Eternity Awaits - by LorettaYoung - 06-12-2014, 06:00 AM
RE: Eternity Awaits - by poe - 06-13-2014, 04:15 AM
RE: Eternity Awaits - by Erthona - 06-13-2014, 06:23 AM



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